6/27/2006 11:38:00 AM|||Jodie Chase|||

Homework is a very real part of a food writer's job, which means nearly every day ends with a frantic grab-and-go. Today, the homework-grab included a copy of ``Chicken or Beef? The World's Best Loved Airline Food'' that arrived about midday. ``Utterly ridiculous,'' I muttered as I opened the envelope and read the book title.

My mind wandered back to the many repulsive meals I've not eaten while flying. Some of the most memorable inedibles include pasty white lasagna that had the consistency of glue and beef stew that looked and smelled like what I might feed my dog. What food served on board any airline could possibly be worth writing about? I pushed the book to the back of the desk so I could focus on the dozen or so tasks that needed to be done before the day was gone.

As I traveled home, I stared at the title sitting next to me on the car seat. I wondered if the book would feature recipes from first-class. I've never flown first-class before. I know my nephew's ticket from SFO to London last week was $7,000. Surely for $7,000, there might be some delectibles included.
Since I was so busy running errands, the book remained open for nearly the entire day. Every time I encountered someone new along my route, I ranted about the ridiculousness of such a book.

At last, many hours later, at a stop light, I opened the book. The pages were blank. The only page with any text at all said in really big print, ``If you can't find it here, it doesn't exist!'' The blank book, it turns out, is an advertisement for Abebooks.com, a company that specializes in rare and out- of-print books. Nice work. Made me laugh... mostly at myself.
-- Jolene Thym

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