“Autism, ADHD & Other Issues”
April 9 at 7 p.m., Danville. Diablo Behavioral Healthcare’s new free, monthly “Ask the Expert” series addresses the more difficult issues in parenting – ADHD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, phobias, anxiety, school refusal, tantrums, autistic spectrum questions and more. (Free, but reservations required. Call 925-648-4800.)

“Childhood Matters: The Triple Bind”
April 11 from 9 to 10 a.m. on Green 960 AM and streamed live on Childhoodmatters.org. Nurse Rona Renner leads a book club discussion of Stephen Hinshaw’s “The Triple Bind,” a book about teenage girls and the high pressure culture of perfectionism.

“Living with Ones and Twos”
April 14 at 7 p.m. at Bananas, Oakland. Free parenting workshop with Meg Zweiback, nurse practitioner.

“Living with Threes and Fours”
April 15 at 7 p.m. at Bananas, Oakland. Free parenting workshop with Meg Zweiback, nurse practitioner.

“Middle to High School Transition”
April 16 at noon at Walnut Creek Intermediate Library.
A free panel discussion sponsored by Acalanes Adult Ed.

“Childhood Matters: The Need for Preschool”
April 18 from 9 to 10 a.m. on Green 960 AM and streamed live on Childhoodmatters.org. Rona Renner, RN, and panelists discuss the need for preschool.

“Childhood Matters: Road to Recovery”
April 25 from 9 to 10 a.m. on Green 960 AM and streamed live on Childhoodmatters.org. Rona Renner, RN, and panelists discuss parenting issues.

“East Bay College Connection Fair”
April 25 from 1 to 4:30 p.m. at Saint Mary’s College, Moraga
More than 150 college reps will be on hand to talk with high school juniors, seniors, parents and counselors at the 18th annual fair. Free.

“Socially Responsible Lifestyle: Changes Start at Home”
April 29 at 7 p.m. at Murwood Elementary, Walnut Creek
Parent talk on ecology, consumerism and responsible parenting by Roberto Giannicola from Provokare. Free. Sponsored by Acalanes Adult Ed.

“Your Spirited Child”
April 29 at 7 p.m. at Bananas, Oakland.
A six-week series on how temperament affects behavior in children, ages 9 months to 5 years. Taught by Helen Neville, BS, RNP. This Kaiser-sponsored class runs April 29 to June 3. To register, call Kaiser at 510-752-6150. ($40 for Kaiser members, $55 for non. Limited free child care available by calling Bananas at 510-658-7353.

Something to add to the list? E-mail us the details or click “comments” and add it right here.

“Childhood Matters”
April 4 from 9 to 10 a.m. on Green 960 AM and streamed live on Childhoodmatters.org. Rona Renner, RN and Dr. Chris Stewart, Pediatrics Director at San Francisco General Hospital, and Abigail Stewart-Kahn from the San Francisco Child Abuse Prevention Center, discuss how to prevent and treat child abuse and neglect.

“Family Life & Spirituality: Family Systems Theory”
April 5 at 4 p.m. at the Episcopal Church of the Resurrection, Pleasant Hill. Last in a 5-part series of parenting workshops on family life and spirituality in this modern, hectic world. Speaker: Rev. Rosa Lee Harden, Episcopal Priest, Holy Innocents Episcopal Church

“Safe Teen Driving Event”
April 9 at 6:30 p.m. at Las Lomas High, Walnut Creek
A California Highway Patrol class for parents and teens to attend together. (Free, but reservations are required.)

“Ask the Expert: Autism, ADHD & Other Issues”
April 9 at 7 p.m., Danville
Diablo Behavioral Healthcare’s new free, monthly “Ask the Expert” series addresses the more difficult issues in parenting – ADHD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, phobias, anxiety, school refusal, tantrums, autistic spectrum questions and more. (Free, but reservations required. Call 925-648-4800.)

“Childhood Matters”
April 11 from 9 to 10 a.m. on Green 960 AM and streamed live on Childhoodmatters.org. Rona Renner, RN and panelists discuss parenting issues.

“Living with Ones and Twos”
April 14 at 7 p.m. at Bananas, Oakland. Free parenting workshop with Meg Zweiback, nurse practitioner.

“Living with Threes and Fours”
April 15 at 7 p.m. at Bananas, Oakland. Free parenting workshop with Meg Zweiback, nurse practitioner.

“Middle to High School Transition”
April 16 at noon at Walnut Creek Intermediate Library.
A free panel discussion sponsored by Acalanes Adult Ed.

“Socially Responsible Lifestyle: Changes Start at Home”
April 29 at 7 p.m. at Murwood Elementary, Walnut Creek
Parent talk on ecology, consumerism and responsible parenting by Roberto Giannicola from Provokare. Free. Sponsored by Acalanes Adult Ed.

“Your Spirited Child”
April 29 at 7 p.m. at Bananas, Oakland.
A six-week series on how temperament affects behavior in children, ages 9 months to 5 years. Taught by Helen Neville, BS, RNP. This Kaiser-sponsored class runs April 29 to June 3. To register, call Kaiser at 510-752-6150. ($40 for Kaiser members, $55 for non. Limited free child care available by calling Bananas at 510-658-7353.

Something to add to the list? E-mail us the details or click “comments” and add it right here.

I am sleepless from laying awake at night trying to make sense of how something like this could happen. And why it seems to happen again and again. I touch my daughter, 7, and son, 4, while they are sleeping, thankful that they are safe. For the moment.

But I have been pushed to the limits of sanity by those two angel faces. Quite routinely in fact. But I would never hurt them. Right???

As the editor responsible for the coverage of this case, I am reaching out to fellow parents and our readers. Please, share your thoughts here. It’s so important that parents openly discuss how they cope when their children push them to the edge. Maybe your comments will help a parent seek help, or maybe you will convince a neighbor who suspects a child is being hurt to call the police.

So try to answer this:

 What separates YOU from a parent or caregiver who does the unthinkable? What do you personally do to cope with a difficult child? Share a story of a specific situation where you avoided a disaster and found a way to save your sanity.

If you don’t feel comfortable posting here, call me at 925-847-2164 or e-mail me at khulac@bayareanewsgroup.com. Staying silent only keeps abuse a secret.

PRESCHOOL TEACHER: If the parent doesn’t obey the teacher’s rules – turns in forms late, for example, or calls instead of e-mailing – chances are the child will be just as disobedient. It “creates an immediate bias against your child,” the anonymous teacher said, “and most teachers feel the same way.”

How do you make the teacher regard you as a “preferred family”? Ask for a classroom wish list, the teacher said: “When you spend maybe $20 on these items, it goes through the grapevine that you are here not just for your kid but for the entire class.” (Um, are we the only folks taken aback?)

Then, the pediatrician said…

THE PEDIATRICIAN’S TAKE: American kids are among the healthiest on the planet, but their parents live in a state of constant fear. “Have confidence,” the doctor said, “that you can handle most of the little throat itches, earaches, goopy eyes, and low fevers your child has. You don’t need me; you just need a little chicken soup and love.” And puh-leeze, he adds, don’t schedule your drastic emergency visit around your child’s baseball game. If your kid is well enough to make it to baseball, he’s not sick enough to see a doc.

There’s more, including never-spoken advice from a day care director, parenting expert, dentist and babysitter.

What do you think? Are the experts out of line? Or would you add to their list?

“10 Great Dates”
Fridays through Aug. 29 from 7 to 9:15 p.m.at Danville’s Community Presbyterian Church
A series designed to energize marriages and strengthen families. Childcare for kids in 1st through 5th grades (babysitting vouchers for younger kids). (One time charge of $15 per couple plus $10 for the book.)

“Childhood Matters: Dyslexia and Learning Difficulties”
Aug. 10 at 9 a.m. on 98.1 KISS-FM and 105.1 KOCN-FM
Childhood Matters’ Rona Renner and panelists talk about how to help kids with learning disabilities succeed in school.

“Childhood Matters: The Need for Preschool”
Aug. 17 at 9 a.m. on 98.1 KISS-FM and 105.1 KOCN-FM
Childhood Matters’ Rona Renner and guest Gloria Corral, deputy director of First Five San Francisco’s Preschool for All Program, talk about the need for preschools and how to choose one for your child.

“Childhood Matters: Preteens in a Tech World”
Aug. 24 at 9 a.m. on 98.1 KISS-FM and 105.1 KOCN-FM
Childhood Matters’ Rona Renner and panelists talk about preteen social development, consumerism, technology and increased screen time.

“Childhood Matters: Disaster Preparedness”
Aug. 31 at 9 a.m. on 98.1 KISS-FM and 105.1 KOCN-FM
Childhood Matters’ Rona Renner and guest Ana-Marie Jones, executive director of Collaborating Agencies Responding to Disasters (CARD), discuss how to prepare for earthquakes, fire and other disasters, and how to talk about it without frightening your kids.

Something to add to the list? E-mail us the details or click “comments” and add it right here.

When is it OK to hit your kids?
Where do you draw the line?
And how do you teach right from wrong?

Click “comments” and share your thoughts.

“How — and when — do I even begin to broach the topic of body image with my kids? Between that JC Penney ad last week and the pop culture all around us, my kids are bombarded by images of impossibly thin models, actresses and athletes. How do I help them feel OK about their bodies when they look nothing like the images out there?”

(To see previous Q&As, check our advice archives.)

My sweet angel has been doing the hitting thing recently. Not at school (where he’s the model child), just with his loved ones at home. We are working on it, but please, if you have any suggestions, send them my way. I feel terrible and am doing all the obvious–telling him to use his words; giving him time outs; taking away privileges, etc. etc. But it’s hard.

I feel part of it is just more vigilance on my part…staying alert to his interactions and conflicts to intervene with a “teaching” moment before he hauls off and whacks someone.

I grew up in a family of four girls, so there’s a slight lack on knowledge about the innate testosterone-fueled aggressiveness of boys on my part. I do know from spending time with his friends and classmates that he is certainly not outside the norm compared to his peers.

But I of course want it to stop. Help!! Send advice!!

Then come back every Sunday morning for discussions of family travel and summer safety on June 8, the emotional needs of new fathers June 15, community violence on June 22 and helping preteens develop a healthy body image on the 29th.

1. Remember this too, shall pass. (And when it does, try to be the better person and not drag up the embarrassing moments.)

2. Understand that your daughter saves the worst for you because she knows you will love her despite anything. Your friends and neighbors, her teachers are telling you what a wonderful, polite, helpful girl she is. Don’t say, “Are you sure you didn’t mix her up with someone else?” Smile and glory in the fact that, despite your fears, she is growing up to be a responsible member of our society. She is successful in presenting herself in the best light outside the home, so she can fall apart when she makes it through the door.

3. Keep your cool. Many times girls say things and act in ways that are not true to themselves, just to see if they can provoke you. Tattoos, piercings, hitchhiking to Santa Cruz or dropping out of high school? Don’t say, “Over my dead body!” Calmly reply “Tell me more. What is your reasoning behind this?” There usually isn’t any.

4. Stand your ground, but give her some negotiating room. As a parent you have a duty to provide your daughter with guidance, rules and boundaries that keep her safe. But those boundaries should be eased as she proves her maturity, or tightened if she breaks them — and most girls will.

5. Take care of yourself. Don’t always put yourself last. Show your daughter by example that a woman should value herself, her mind, soul, body, and health. Nurture your marital relationship. Couples who play together, stay together. Schedule regular dates, walks, dinners with friends, short trips or even mini-vacations, if you have good supervision for your daughter.

And finally, remember, says Ksenija, that “there are no Perfect Mothers, just Good Enough Mothers. Don’t beat yourself up for your inadequacies. You will make mistakes, sometimes warranting an ‘I am sorry’ or ‘I was wrong.’ You are only human, not God. If you will recall, even s/he had trouble with Adam and Eve.”

More parenting wisdom? Click “comments” and share.