By Tony Hicks
Friday, July 27th, 2007 at 2:33 pm in Uncategorized.
So it’s Friday, which is the day I pick up my daughter for the weekend. Only I actually had to go get her before I finished working, which typically means I bring her back to the office … which gives her license to behave however she fits. Because the little beast is clever. She understands I can’t hit her in front of an office full of people.
Not even when she announces, while I’m speaking with a co-worker, that she can smell one of my body parts. Twice
They all think she’s cute, and she knows it. And she is cute, which irritates me to no end. They all come over to talk to her; they offer to take her to the restroom while I’m working, they give her little presents. The guys in Sports asked her to autograph a copy of Bay Area Parents magazine, on which she’s on the cover this month. She basically receives a license once she’s here to get away with murder – a trait she’ll no doubt carry with her the rest of her life. Cute people get things the rest of us don’t.
On the other hand, having my 5-year-old daughter at the office is great for productivity. I have to work as fast as possible, as the noise level gets higher the longer I’m here. The kid will only color for so long, and I can only pacify her for so long with Elvis magnets and goodies from the candy machine. Today she insisted on having Skittles. An argument ensued – people started watching. I had no choice but to cave. Now the sugar is really starting to take hold. I might as well have given her some crack.
At least she’s not as bad as some kid belonging to a former co-worker, who once came in and immediately started asking me loud questions…while I was doing an interview on the phone. Then the little chimp started whacking at my keyboard while I was trying to take notes.
Anyways…I just noticed things got quiet. Too quiet. Evil is afoot and it’s time to investigate.
Oh God, no…she’s blurting out the word “vomit” for no apparent reason…time to go.
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