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Down Goes Hicks.

By Tony Hicks
Thursday, September 27th, 2007 at 2:11 pm in Uncategorized.

Experts say it’s better to interact and play with your children than just stick them on front of the TV.

Experts are stupid.

I was leaving work with my daughter last evening when she spotted the big trees and lawn on the side of CCT HQ. She had this fantastic idea that we could play hide-and-seek.

Well, this sounded fun, I decided. I hid behind some paper racks bordering the lawn. She found me and I took off running with her in hot pursuit. Unfortunately, I didn’t see the massive mud puddle, next to these giant tree roots coming out of the ground.

I slipped, falling harder than Michael Spinks at the end of a Tyson right cross. I was wearing shorts, and my ankle and knee hit the giant tree root and slid, taking about seven layers of skin. The rest of me ended up in the mud.

When I got up, I looked like the Swamp Thing – only bloodier. Which made my daughter laugh uproariously at my misfortune, proving beyond the scope of any DNA test that she really is my daughter.

But then – because she’s 5 – she realized I was in pain. So she started crying. I tried to hug her, but she ran away, either because she didn’t want to get muddy, or I suddenly looked like Bigfoot.

Someone came out of the building a few minutes later, when I was limping to the car and leaving a trail of blood. I was walking like Frankenstein, thanks to the hardening mud covering most of me. The person froze, not knowing what to do: offer help, hose me down, take custody of the small girl from the vicious swamp creature, or call security.

They opted to go back inside and forget they ever saw me. I drove home and showered.

I’m too old for this stuff.

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6 Responses to “Down Goes Hicks.”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    This is boring. Who cares?
    (Sometimes you can do it Hicks, and sometimes you fall flat, so to speak.) Get back up.

  2. Tony Hicks Says:

    Ah … old Mr. Anonymous. You always seem to be the one complaining.

  3. Danny Says:

    Should I feel guilty for laughing at the pain, cause I kinda do. Well, if it happened on company property, just fill out those workers comp forms and try to hide from the investigators. Those buggers can find you almost anywhere.

  4. Jennifer Says:

    This is great! I have two boys ages 6 & 4. I can picture this perfectly. Only my kids would have tried to tackle me before jumping in the mud themselves.

  5. Tony Hicks Says:

    Don’t feel guilty – I milked it enough after I got home to more than make up for the pain. And don’t think it didn’t dawn on me that it happened on company property. Though, to be fair, some might say I’m already taking enough of their money for tackling serious journalistic topics like playing hide and seek.

  6. Joe Says:

    Ah, so nice to find other members of the “laughter at someone else’s expense is the best medicine” club.