After Proposition 8′s victory last week, meaning the state constitution may be amended to eliminate same-sex marriage rights (pending 4,000 lawsuits) Melissa Etheridge has announced she doesn’t want to pay taxes anymore.

Etheridge, one of the highest-profile lesbians in the entertainment world, says if she doesn’t get the same rights as other people, that makes her a second-class citizen. Therefore, she will no longer pay first-class taxes on the gobs of money she makes each year.

Makes perfect sense to me.

Actually, I’m inspired. Since the state won’t let me have a pond full of alligators in my backyard and an anti-aircraft gun to fire at teenagers who drive their cars too fast down my street, I’m announcing that I, too, am being treated as a second-class citizen.

Therefore, I’m not paying taxes anymore. Which is too bad for the state, since I make so much money, the government may just shut down until we get this resolved. I read the Constitution in high school, or college or something, and I know it says something about big guns and pet reptiles in there. It’s called self-defense, folks.

Photo of alligator in pond in Hilton Head Plantation by Flickr user ‘villian’ used under Creative Commons license