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Mt. Britney is starting to rumble

By Tony Hicks
Tuesday, November 18th, 2008 at 3:48 pm in Uncategorized.

Britney Spears' "Circus"

Britney Spears recently said in an interview that her new-found sober and relatively sane life is like “Groundhog Day” and that, at least when you go to prison, you know you’re going to get out someday.

Tick … tick … tick … tick …

This isn’t good. The paparazzi are all sitting in a room like firemen, waiting for the emergency klaxon to go off so they can slide down the pole and into their SUVs at a moment’s notice.

Britney’s father needs to put everyone on red alert and double the guard at the gate. We’re going to need an ambulance on stand-by, with the engine running, and snipers with tranquilizer guns covering all the exits. Also, we may want to call around and see which rehab has a bed open, just in case.

Hang in there, Britney. Somebody get her some soothing herbs and a copy of “Guitar Hero” or something. We’ve got to keep her inside at all costs. Maybe an assistant can set up a Barbie village to play with or something.

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