By Tony Hicks
Tuesday, December 16th, 2008 at 11:32 am in Uncategorized.
One of the best things about other’s people’s misery is how great it makes you feel about yourself. So allow me to brighten your otherwise soggy, grim day.
After waking up to realize that, despite being 41, I still must deal with giant pimples appearing out of nowhere on my face, I had to sit through my baby crying through three shots at the doctor’s office, which is always great because they (the baby, not the doctor) look at you like it’s your fault. Then I discovered my divorce – which I believed to be final many many months ago – may not actually be final final. Because, while some documents say its final, that may just be technical jargon to confuse you so government clerks can have a hearty laugh at your expense.
After my head nearly imploded from my new migraine, I came home to discover my dog had attacked, destroyed and eaten one of the kids’ advent calendars. Then, while I expressed my anger in a non-violent, but admittedly-loud, fashion, he looked at me with his big dopey face … and proceeded to pee himself in fear.
Great. I pick on helpless animals until they pee. I can’t wait for what happens later, when he processes all that chocolate.
And the day is still young. I’ll tell you right now if a get a phone call, teling me to pack up my personal belongings and report to the boss, something bad will happen. In the meantime, if anyone has any medication they’d like to share, please contact me at once.