Kids are stupid
By Tony Hicks
Wednesday, August 12th, 2009 at 1:21 pm in Uncategorized.
There’s always one guy in the bunch.
Some dumb kid named Russell Gortzig in Florida, where thousands of people buy baby pythons not realizing they’ll grow bigger than their house and need setting free, watched a video on YouTube where some idiot (in a banana suit – seriously) successfully lights himself on fire. So stupid Russell (I only call him that because he’s still alive … and stupid) and his pal siphon gas from a lawmower and ignite a lighter.
Am I missing something here?
I clearly remember being 13 years old and understanding that flames and gas are a bad idea. And If that wasn’t among the stupid things I did when I was 13 (trust me – the list is long), then a kid REALLY has to be stupid to do it.
Besides, I totally knew when I was 13 that the only guy who could play with fire and gas was Gene Simmons.
I love how the mom tries to blame YouTube instead of her own obviously faulty genetics. Maybe someone should’ve explained to Russell that fire and gas, when put together, go boom.
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August 12th, 2009 at 5:52 pm
I read your article on contra costa while looking for the totally-didn’t-see-it-coming-……yaaaaaa-right news about the “The Bachelorette”, and i have to say i find you very funny. In a witty/clever/hey, i think i’ll read every word and not skim/dave eggers kind of way. and then i did a search of your name on contra costa and read some more articles. high praise for a writer, let me tell ya. i even googled you, but something tells me your weren’t in an English pop group from Manchester in the 60′s…