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Sweet mother … no!

By Tony Hicks
Thursday, April 28th, 2011 at 11:06 pm in Uncategorized.

It’s 10:47 p.m. I got home 20 minutes ago from a dinner with two old friends. My kids are still awake. My animals are still awake. The kids are watching Caillou (I don’t know how to spell it, and if I did my shame would force me to consider self-mutilation. I just know it’s the worst children’s show ever). And my wife, while laughing at me,  just got dressed and left.

No, I’m not kidding

My mother followed through on her threat to have some sort of all-night party celebrating the marriage of two skinny English people we don’t even know. My mom, my two aunts, and my wife are attending. Which would be fine with me, but it doesn’t start until 4 a.m. Until then, they’re going to eat disgusting, pickled English food, drink English booze, and probably speak with stupid accents.

 

Didn’t America suffer enough to free ourselves from these people? Why are we celebrating them? And did we really fight them in the battle of Detroit? Did we get Detroit because we lost?

I’m not happy. My wife thinks it’s funny, because she’s on vacation and the kids are on Spring break. I’m not on either. These children don’t listen when she’s not around. I want to go to bed. I wish William Wallace was alive to stop this madness.

I’ll check in later – if I’m able. Maybe if I stay up late blogging, they won’t make me go to work in the morning.

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One Response to “Sweet mother … no!”

  1. heyjoe Says:

    yeah, all have been spring breaking around here too. Well almost all. Tip a little Beefeater and join the party.

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