My thoughts after the first week
By akwok
Friday, September 7th, 2007 at 11:08 am in Andy Kwok, General.
It was by no means what I expected. I mean, it was, but it wasn’t. Of the 5 days, I went home all but one of the days with a sickening feel to my stomach. I went home exhausted, leading to one day sleeping at 9pm. I knew it was going to be hard. I knew the kids were going to be trying, they were going to be behind grade level, ….and they were going to be sweet. Talk about roller coaster.
There were days where I wanted to grab a student and slap behavioral sense in them. There were days I wanted to hug a student for getting the right answer. There were days I wanted to vomit (or at least dry heave) after a class and there were days where I felt like I could change the world.
Thankfully, the faculty has been supportive. There has been constant checking in on me to see how I survived. There is nonstop empathy. Notice, not sympathy, but empathy. They give no false words of, “Oh, just the first week. It’ll be fine from here on out.” Rather, it is, “Brother, I feel your pain. We can get through this.” That was comforting to some extent but I’d be lying if I didn’t say it doesn’t scare me.
“Can I handle them?”
“Can I teach them?”
“Can I make it through the year?”
I knew this year was going to be rough. I knew there’d be much sacrifice and pain. I just didnt know what it’d feel like. After week one, now I have some idea.
Andy Kwok is a biology teacher at EXCEL High School.
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September 10th, 2007 at 10:35 am
From the start Andy you are doing great. I am planning on applying for the teaching Fellowship in Oakland for the 2008- 2009 year. Hopefully we’ll connect.
September 10th, 2007 at 10:51 am
Mr Kwok,you have true heart.I sub at the Mc Clymonds complex occasionally and am well aware of the challenges you face.I think your passion and commitment will eventually win most of the kids over to appreciating the wonders of science.Can you win them ALL over?As heretical as this might sound,probably NOT.However,you never know WHICH students will just not be willing or able to connect with you.Therefore,you must conduct your class as IF all CAN and bring them all into academic excellence.
Good luck,sir.I will be following your year at EXCEL closely!
September 10th, 2007 at 1:23 pm
My man,
Teaching is simple. Engage students in ACTIVITIES that promote their learning. Do not try to “manage” them. Make them do the academic stuff and support their learing. Any student who does not want to participate is asked to leave. No exceptions. They will learn to learn or learn to leave
September 10th, 2007 at 3:32 pm
keep your head up and keep up the good work. looks like you can do some great things out there.
September 11th, 2007 at 7:28 am
Hey Cousin Andy, I am so proud of you. You are doing great out there and I am sure your great effort will be rewarded. Keep up with the good work and gratz on your graduation and new job.
September 11th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
Hi Andy,
I feel you! I still remember my first year teaching in Oakland. It was tough! Some thoughts: try to always remember to have fun and enjoy yourself in the moment. Sure, there will be plenty of times when you wish a certain student would act a certain way, that everyone brought in their homework, attended class, and spoke in an orderly fashion…but what I learned is that if you are enjoying yourself and being with your students as they are (flawed, just like all of us), then you will enjoy this profession immensely. Like one of the previous posters, the more you try to control and manage the students and show your frustration with that aspect, the harder it will be. Also, if you are enjoying your classes, it will show and your students will be more relaxed and less stressed and they will have fun too!! I’m sure they already like you. It is tough being a young teacher sometimes but stay with it and you will find many little and big joys in it. Also, remember that you are teacher teaching a certain subject and curriculum, but don’t forget the whole student (sometimes a student just needs someone to listen to them and it has nothing to do with the subject matter, science or your lesson plan). Good luck and I look forward to more of your chronicles!!
September 12th, 2007 at 2:13 pm
Andy,
I commend you for what you are doing, being a graduate from MACK in 1992 when it was just one school, let me tell you it was tough for the students and the teacher as well. Now that I think back there were 3 types of teacher: the control type, these were the ones who rule with an iron fist and if you were a trouble kid with issue (like most teens are) then you either go with general’s (the teacher) program or you didn’t have the class. The second type was a diplomat, this type catered to the kids too much letting them get away with little things like speaking out of turn and chewing gum. This always lead to BIGGER issues because the kids felt they could run over you (lose respect for you). The third is a combination of the first two, which worked like a charm. You have to find your medium and let them know you are there to teach and not babysit and if they cannot get with the program then they must go because there are kids who are there to learn and why spoil it for them. Everyone can be taught, the question is do they want to be?
September 12th, 2007 at 7:40 pm
good luck!worked for ops for thirty years,retired-not too many words of wisdom,you’ll be able to it on your own-oh………………..one piece of advice………..take time for yourself-when thw weekend comes do what you can do to enjoy it-good luck
September 13th, 2007 at 12:21 pm
Andy,
Remember to connect with them as people, not as economic status or race. Listen to them this is how you understand what you are dealing with. There will be those you can help and those that will never be helped, learning to identify is what your task should be this year. You will be fine.
September 14th, 2007 at 9:02 pm
I dont usually write in blogs but yours was so cute & funny I just come and say something. Two things you have going for you is that your young and you’re a male. I have teens, work w/ many teens and have alot of friends & family who also have alot of kids in Oakland & Berkeley schools. I also grew up in Oakland schools. Theres many good teachers here but I notice it’s always the young female elementry & middle school teachers who end up loosing it then doing something unprofessional and the kids end up loosing all respect for them. Remember, alot of these teens have been thru alot on the homefront and do things just for attention. All they need is just that, one on one. Being a counselor, I’ve given some of them hugs and seen them break down because they don’t get hugs at home and needed to feel loved that bad. My sons have told me some horror stories which their friends confided to them that would break the hardest heart, making me promise not to call the police. It’s uncomprehensible what happened to alot of these teens when they were little behind closed doors, & the physical abuse my God. When you see one who tries his best to act hard, remember it’s only a defense he uses to protect himself from being hurt again. There’s a little boy lying dormant somewhere in him. God Bless~~
September 15th, 2007 at 5:39 pm
this is oakland its gonna be hard as hella as some kids are misdemeanors, some kids will try to make u feel like ur in hell, just gotta learn to work with it
September 16th, 2007 at 2:09 am
Hi Andy,
It’s great that you are writing about becoming a teacher! Where would we be if we could not read about other people’s experiences? We’d have to learn it all the hard way. Can I make a couple of suggestions? Change all the names! That’s for privacy. And for every negative, balance it with a positive. In fact, I’d like to be able to describe the ah-ha, I got it moments moments more myself. More success than concern. I think the video is magical! I would much rather be watching a young, just out-of-college teacher, than an old, tired out overweight teacher on the video! Hey, we can’t all be Charley’s Angels, but good luck to those who can!
Jean
September 17th, 2007 at 5:51 pm
Hey there, Jean:
Please don’t assume because a teacher is “old” or even “overweight,” they are not dynamic teachers. I’m almost 50, so I guess I’m ”old,” and I’m no model, but I’m absolutely at the top of my game. And I bet any video of me teaching would pretty damned riveting. Don’t assume I’m burned out. This is pretty typical of the insults that drive teachers out of the district.
I’m a much better teacher now than when I started, even if I was “cuter” then (who gives a damn, really?), and while I give nothing to props to new young teachers, I’ve yet to meet a brand new teacher who can hold a candle to myself or many of the other 20+ year veterans I know.
Show those of us who have stuck with it and are still in there with a lot of heart and soul all the respect we deserve.
September 18th, 2007 at 9:24 am
1. Don’t smile ’till Christmas
2. My first year of teaching high school was harder than my first year of
medical school.
3. If you have a 50 minute class, you need 50 minutes of activities. Any wasted time
is an opportunity for chaos to ensue.
4. Do your best. Your reward is knowing you are doing important work and you are
doing the best you can every day. You will get very little thanks or praise so if you
get a compliment, cherish it.
5. Remember, these are kids, not adults. Don’t overestimate what silly, goofy techniques
will engage them in learning.
6. Next year will be way better.
Good Luck,
Kevin G. Hart, MD
September 18th, 2007 at 3:54 pm
Andy,
Thank you for trying. Thank you for coming back a second and third day. Thank you for be
wanting to believe they can do it even when you doubt it some days. Teachers like your
self are making a difference every day. For every one student you can get through to
you have made a difference already.
Kathy Goodall
September 19th, 2007 at 3:53 pm
Congratulations on becoming a teacher!
I have a friend who received a teacher’s credential, took the RICA test at least 4 or 5 times before *barely* passing. She couldn’t find any part-time or full-time teaching job– not even any teacher’s assistant position. I think part of the reason is her impatient, negative attitude along with an *explosive* short temper. I was talking to some coworkers about her situation and they agree that such wanna-be teachers should not be teaching, let alone be near elementary age children. I concur.
Do any of you have any advice? I think she’s depressed and unmotivated now since the school year started and many of the more desirable teacher positions have been filled. Do you think the NCLB federal law made it more difficult for teachers like her to get a job, esp. of the “highly qualified” status that’s required now? (I last checked on her August 26, the week that many school districts begin instruction.) Please be honest with your opinion.
September 25th, 2007 at 9:11 pm
I have hugged a student for getting the right answer.
September 28th, 2007 at 3:15 pm
Don’t smile until Christmas? That’s not good advice (unless you normally don’t smile). You need to be yourself to a certain degree — authenticity is important, since the kids are incredible at sensing phoniness.
November 1st, 2007 at 12:03 pm
Maybe, if teachers would begin teaching the students, particularly the inner city students, the African Scholar John Mark Wrote John’s Gospel and was the mysterious disciple “whom Jesus loved” … y’all could boost the confidence of some of these young people.
Come see us at TANATA: Things (often) Are Not As They Appear
R.C. Gray
November 9th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
First of all, you look even better than when I taught you at Parkway North High! Somehow, even with the dry heaves, teaching must agree with you. Have you seen “The Ron Clark Story” (aka “The Triumph”) with “Friends” star Matthew Perry in an excellent performance? Also, Truffaut’s “The Wild Child,” which formed my own teaching ethic, “Up the Down Staircase,” and of course “The Miracle Worker.” “The Andy Kwok Story” is just beginning. You only vomit because you care….
December 12th, 2007 at 10:45 am
I know you had other posts. Why can’t I find them anymore? Are you going to post again.?