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PETA turns candidates into veggies

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) has just rolled out “Road to the Greenhouse,” a new political spoof video pitting “Broccoli Obama, Celery Clinton, Mike Huckleberry, Dijon McCain, Mitt Ramen-y, and a bunch of other high-fiber candidates against each other in a debate about one of the most important issues facing our country today: Is it time to give peas a chance?”

OK, when you stop groaning, go see the video here.

Featuring puppets made out of real vegetables and a “peanut gallery” to cheer them on, the spoof pokes fun at the candidates “while driving home the point that any American who is concerned about their health or the environment should consider adopting a vegetarian diet,” PETA says.

For example: “Eating my veggies has not only caused a noticeable improvement in my health, but I was able to date and eventually marry a 29-year-old bombshell with a tongue stud,” says canned-idate Dennis KuSpinach.

Aaarrrgh.

“I, for one, know from experience that a Whopper at the drive-thru can lead directly to a flopper in the bedroom,” says Celery Clinton. “America’s women don’t ever want to have to be in the position of saying to their husbands, ‘Close, but no cigar.’ The best thing for my husband is a healthy vegetarian diet.”

Yow! And I’m blogging this right after having covered Bill Clinton in Oakland… at a barbecue restaurant!!!

Anyhow, PETA cites a 2006 United Nations report that says raising animals for food emits 40 percent more global-warming gases than all the cars, trucks, SUVs, planes, and ships in the world combined. And a recent study by the University of Chicago found that going vegan is 50 percent more effective at fighting global warming than switching from a standard car to a hybrid.

PETA wants you to know they don’t oppose or endorse any candidates or parties. “Road to the Greenhouse is a joint project of PETA and Free Range Studios, a progressive-minded digital graphics communications firm with offices in Washington, D.C. and — you might’ve guessed – Berkeley.

Josh Richman

Josh Richman covers state and national politics for the Bay Area News Group. A New York City native, he earned a bachelor’s degree in journalism from the University of Missouri and reported for the Express-Times of Easton, Pa. for five years before coming to the Oakland Tribune and ANG Newspapers in 1997. He is a frequent guest on KQED Channel 9’s “This Week in Northern California;” a proud father; an Eagle Scout; a somewhat skilled player of low-stakes poker; a rather good cook; a firm believer in the use of semicolons; and an unabashed political junkie who will never, EVER seek elected office.